“I won’t play with you!” When the child was rejected, a treatment method made the child very popular

Children want to play with children, but they may not meet their wishes. They will be rejected on the spot and will not show mercy. After hearing this, the child will be very depressed and even cry. How to alleviate such an embarrassing situation, so that children can be relieved, and then get friends to play with? It is a problem worthy of discussion.

Erbao likes to play on the slide and also likes to stack up. If children play together, he will be especially happy. Every time he meets children, whether familiar or not, he wants to play with them, but sometimes he is refused.

Once, I met a little boy. Er Bao chased after him and wanted to play with him. The little boy didn't know Erbao and refused directly. The boy cried and said to his mother: I don't want to play with him!

I thought Er Bao had bullied others. I hurried to greet him. I knew I was thinking too much.

Since people are reluctant, they can't force them to play together, nor can they ask them to play together. I had an idea. I squatted down and said to Er Bao, "You can play with other children first!"

Erbao was not happy when he heard this, and he also cried: "I want to play with him."

I said to him calmly, "You are very happy to play. Other children feel that it is fun there, and they will take the initiative to play with you. If you cry, other children think that there is danger, and they dare not come to play with you. Good friends are not begged, but attracted. Now go and have fun!"

Erbao was moved by me and went to play on the slide happily. After a while, two children came. The little boy was so greedy that he joined them in tears and said to Erbao, "I'll play with you.".

Another time, Er Bao and two children went on a slide together. They met each other and wanted to isolate Er Bao. They said to Er Bao, "We won't play with you. You can play by yourself!"

Er Bao was at a loss. Tears were swirling in her eyes. I said to Erbao, "You can go slide there and have a good time." Erbao did so. Later, the two children went to Erbao and said, "We are good friends with you.".

Therefore, I summarized one thing: "I won't play with you!" When a child is rejected, one way to deal with it is to use the law of attraction. Children don't care that no one plays with them, as long as they play happily, they can attract people who like to play with them. If you are in full bloom, butterflies will come.

In specific operations, we can do this to make children willing to accept suggestions and develop their own principles.

When we see a child crying, we are both distressed and irritated. When we talk to the child, we will say in a voice of reproach, "Just cry. People don't play with you. As for crying, is it different to play with someone else?"

The child was sad because he was rejected. Our accusation is a secondary injury. The child feels that no one understands him, so he will be more sad and often cry more violently.

Therefore, we must adjust our emotions and think that this experience is a good opportunity to exercise children and let them learn to solve social problems. After emotional stability, our thinking becomes rational and we can communicate with children calmly.

We should squat down, keep the same height as the child's standing height, look at the child's eyes, let the child feel that we are communicating with him on an equal footing, let him put down his guard, and readily accept our suggestions.

The child's social experience is limited, and he can't do anything at all. We need to tell him how to do it. The simpler and more operable the method is, the better he can perform.

For example, if children want to play on the slide with their children, they will say to them, "You should have fun playing on the slide.

For example, if a child wants to play with a toy, he or she can say to him or her, "There are several ways to play with your toy. If you play with all of them, the child will find you interesting."

The child knows what to do and follows suit. When children are happy, it is like the butterfly effect that affects others and naturally finds playmates with similar interests.

After the child gets friends to play with, we should help him make a summary to let him realize that this method is effective so that he can use it in the future.

We need to describe the whole process of the event to the child, so that the child knows the benefits of doing so.

We said to the children: Look, you can play on the slide happily, and other children want to play with you. In the future, when children don't play with you, you will say "OK", and then go to play happily, and children will come to play with you. It's the same whether it's outside or at school. It is the same way to play with slides and toys.

A child who successfully solves a social problem does not mean that the next time he or she encounters the same problem, he or she will be able to do the same and may be embarrassed. Let's not worry. Children need to sum up experience from experience to experience to a certain extent before they can use it freely. We remain patient and wait for the flowers to bloom.

Write at the end: Children often encounter such problems as "I don't play with you" in life. We should not feel sorry for the children, but keep calm, teach them to face this problem correctly, and let them keep happy, attract friends, rather than pray for friends.

I am @ Ningma Wuyu

Mother of two boys, more than 10 years of childcare experience

Reading with children, English enlightenment, scientific enlightenment

Share the experience of child care and implement the dry goods of child care

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